Showing posts with label birth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label birth. Show all posts

Monday, May 2, 2011

Norah Annabel Smith's Birth: Part Two

I've decided to divide these posts into two parts, because Norah's birth itself was so perfect and went just as we could have hoped and planned for.  I made it through without medication or intervention, and she was delivered safely and healthy.  The aftermath is a completely different story, and I want to separate the fear and negative emotions from this part in their own right.  I wish I didn't have to write this part at all, because it really changes how I look back on part of my daughter's birth day, but I have to process what happened here just as much as how amazing her birth was.

Part Two: Third Stage of Delivery; Post-Partum Hemorrhage
After she was out, we had opted for "expectant management" of the third stage of labor; delivery of the placenta.  Basically that means we were going to wait for my body to do what it was supposed to do, and let my uterus contract on its own to expel the placenta, rather than jump start this with a dose of Pitocin injected in my thigh. This is something that usually happens within 30 minutes of birth.  So while Norah and I were being cleaned up and checked out, we waited.  My Mom had come down and was there with us at this point, and Matt's Dad and the kids came by to meet Norah, but they didn't stay very long, which ended up being a really good thing.  However, after waiting 30 minutes, I'd really had no more contractions, and when Kathy gave a little tug on the cord, the placenta was definitely still attached.  They gave me a shot of Pitocin in the leg at this point to encourage contractions, but after maybe another 15 minutes nothing was happening.  Kathy started to get a little worried and they decided to start an IV and hang a bag of Pitocin pretty much wide open to have one last ditch attempt at delivering the placenta normally.   This didn't have any effect, and we were now getting to point where the placenta needed to come out.  Kathy paged OB, and an OB resident named Samar came down to consult on what to do.  They said they could go in and remove it with manual traction, but most women find this way too painful to undergo without pain medication or anesthesia.  After some brief discussion, we opted to have a spinal or epidural placed and even though I'd made it through the birth without this, I really didn't want to go through any more pain unnecessarily. *

*Somewhere in the midst of this time, I guess Holly had been called in on her day off to come see me.  She was wonderful - she came up to me and told me how beautiful Norah was and how great of a job I was doing.  She was so positive and calming, and I know she helped both Matt and my Mom get through the next few hours too.

Anesthesia was paged, but they were in the OR working on a case, and while we waited for them to come down, Kathy realized that the Pitocin was working to some extent and the placenta seemed to have loosened and she thought she could manually remove it quickly.  She asked me to push, while she pulled on the cord and massaged (FIRMLY. Read, PAINFULLY) from the outside.  This was probably as painful the actual delivery, and when the placenta came out Kathy realized it was coming apart in pieces.  Immediately after that, a HUGE gush of blood came pouring out, and she felt that part of the placenta was retained.  She began trying to remove the pieces by hand, which was horrible, but necessary.  I was bleeding heavily, and we couldn't wait for anesthesia to come to the bedside.  Samar was paged again, and she came right down to check with an ultrasound what it looked like inside.  There was definitely a large part of placenta and lots of blood clots retained, and they felt I needed to go to the OR immediately to stop the bleeding.  It turns out I had a succenturiate ("extra") placental lobe, and this was the main part that was retained.  I was scared, and I knew the situation was serious.  I looked at Matt, and I know he was terrified too, but neither of us knew how bad it was going to get.  They pretty much packed up the bed and ran down the hall with me at this point.

Matt was given Norah and told he would have to wait with her in newborn recovery because her newborn screening wasn't quite complete.  They did follow our wishes though, and delayed the eye ointment and Vit K injection during the time between delivery and when I left for the OR, so I had nearly an hour with her without any extra interventions.  Matt and my Mom went to wait with her, and I was wheeled into the OR.

I was starting to get incredibly shaky, and by the time I got to OR I was in so much pain I was becoming delirious and just wanted them to do whatever they needed to in order to stop the pain.  They asked me to sit up and try to transfer to the OR table, and when I pushed up to sit, I nearly passed out, so they laid me back down and had several people help slide me over onto my side.  My legs were cramping, my abdomen was cramping, and I was freezing cold.  They were still planning to do a spinal for anesthesia, but they had to get extra IV lines in first.  I'd already lost about 600 cc's of blood at the bedside, and my veins were  nearly impossible to start a line in.  The anesthesia resident ended up getting one started, but before they could run the fluids they needed through it to get prepped for the spinal, I began gushing blood again.  I ended up losing 2100 cc's total (just over 2 liters) and my blood pressure dropped to 50's/40's.  I remember at this point through the pain, someone said "She's going to crash if we do the spinal..." and they began rushing around to start general anesthesia.

I was flipped over from my side to my back by about 10 people, and suddenly the OR filled up with 20-30 people rushing around.  Someone tipped my head back and checked my throat size for intubation, and I started to get really scared.  I was afraid of being intubated while I was awake, and I also asked the attending anesthesiologist (Dr. Greene) if I was going to lose my uterus.   She told me if anyone was going to have their uterus out any time soon it was going to be her! I was shaking uncontrollably and moaning that I just wanted something to stop the pain, and the next thing I knew they had a mask on me with oxygen and something else to put me to sleep before they intubated me.  It probably only took 15 seconds before I was out, but I was gasping on that oxygen and just hoping to be knocked out ASAP.  It took effect, and I don't remember anything after that until I went to to recovery, which ended up being a really good thing.  I am actually grateful that I didn't have the spinal, because I would have been awake and scared throughout the whole procedure.

I was in the OR for about an hour and a half, and they ended up doing an emergency D&C to clean all the retained placental pieces and blood clots from my uterus.  During this time, they also gave me 2 units of blood and several bags of IV fluids, plus a barrage of medications to make my uterus contract to stop the bleeding.  Because my blood pressure was dangerously low, they also gave me "pressers" to keep me stable.  This information was all relayed to my Mom and Matt, and at this point I think Matt realized how serious the situation was.  I will never know exactly what was going through his head while he was holding his hours old daughter and hearing the information from the OR, but I know that it was a really scary time for him.

After I was stabilized and the procedures were completed, they took me to recovery.  It took a while to wake up, and I remember catching a glimpse of myself in a mirror at some point.  I was a color of gray-white I had never seen a person before from all the blood loss.  I felt pretty terrible, but once I was awake enough, Matt and Norah were able to come back and that helped so much to see them.  The staff watched me closely for another few hours, and it wasn't until about 10:30 PM that we were finally taken to a recovery room.  The nurses got me all situated and then around midnight Matt asked if I was hungry and I was! We ordered from Pizza House and I got mac and cheese - the GD diagnosis was clear and I was given the go-ahead for a normal diet!

The first night was rough and I barely slept, even after the general anesthesia (not to mention the 14 hour labor).  Norah was by my side and even though she was a wonderful tiny brand new thing, she sure didn't sleep long either! Tuesday I was feeling slightly better, although by then all the IV fluids that had been pushed through my system were settling in and I was swollen everywhere - my eyelids, fingers, toes, legs...I looked pretty rough.  Every time I sat up or stood to walk to the bathroom, I was getting a bit dizzy and could hear my heart pounding in my ears, and that combined with my blood work that said my hematocrit and hemoglobin levels were still quite low, we decided I would get another transfusion with 2 more units of blood.  This helped so much, and by Tuesday evening I was moved out of the high-risk recovery and over to general recovery.  Tuesday night I finally was able to shower and felt much more human after that, and Tuesday night went pretty well.  By Wednesday I was feeling much, much better, and we were given the all-clear that we could go home.  We were packed up and ready to go by about 6:00 PM, and it felt so wonderful to finally be able to bring our daughter home.

Today Norah is one week old - in 20 minutes actually - and I can't believe how my life has changed in 7 short days.  I am so thankful for an amazing team of caregivers who brought my daughter into the world safely, and then in a matter of minutes snapped into action and saved my life.  Had we not been in the hospital, the outcome might not have been the same.  I will never question our choice of care providers or our decision to have a hospital birth - it was the beautiful, unmedicated, intervention free experience I had hoped for all the way up to her birth, but when it quickly became a life and death emergency for me, I was right where I needed to be.  I'll probably never know many of the 20-30 people who were in the OR with me doing their jobs on 4/25, but I know that they saved my life and even if I could tell them all in person how grateful I am, I don't think words will ever be enough.  I'm sitting here holding my perfect daughter and able to see her grow up with my amazing husband because of a team of people were at UM doing their jobs flawlessly and caringly when I needed them.  Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Coming Home

3 days old

3 days old

The Arrival of Norah Annabel Smith: Part One

*Of course this is the post the blog has been leading up to for 9 months, and I wanted to make sure that I wrote the story of her birth in a way that helps me remember the details.  That being said, it's likely that portions will be fairly descriptive and possibly graphic due to some of the circumstances that occurred.  I know that most friends and family reading this have already heard many of the details, but for others checking in I just wanted to clarify that I'm writing this as much for myself as for the blog so that I can process the event. It will be long, and hopefully not TMI for most of you :) *

Part 1 - Labor and Norah's Birth
April 25, 2:12 AM:

I woke from a sound sleep to the sensation that my water had broken, and got up to check and be sure...there was no doubt about it and I came back to bed to tell Matt that we're going to meet our daughter soon! I started timing contractions which began immediately after, and they ranged from 4-7 min apart and  lasted about 1:00 for a while.  Winnie (our cat) was up with me and totally knew something was going on, while Lainey (the dog) casually glanced at me on my way past her to the bathroom as if to say "I'm sleeping right here, please don't step on me" and promptly went back to sleep.  I told Matt to try and get some rest, as he had literally just turned out the light and gone to sleep just about 2!  

5:19 AM: Labor has definitely started! Nothing serious yet, but contractions are consistently about 5 min apart and getting slowly stronger.  I think we're going to have a birthday today (well...I hope it's today and not tomorrow!!)  I am able to manage the contractions mostly by sitting on an exercise ball and rocking side to side. I've had to have Matt help me focus on a few of them and he's a great support! 

7:41 AM: Called OB Triage as contractions are now about 3 min apart and have been for the past hour. I have had a few contractions that dropped me to my hands and knees and definitely feel the need to start making some noise to get through them.  There is no real way to be distracted through them at this point, and just have to focus on coping with each one.  Because my water had broken they asked me to come in and be checked and hopefully be admitted.  We scurried around and packed the last minute items we could think of, and we headed off to UM around 9:00.

At this point my times get a little less specific, but around 9:30 we got to the hospital and went up to triage. They got me hooked up to a fetal monitor to watch baby's heart rate and to follow my contractions, and paged the midwife on-call to come down and check me for a starting point.  A midwife student named Anouk was here studying from the Netherlands, and she was with us pretty much from triage through delivery.  I can't say enough how special it was to have her support throughout the process - she was truly wonderful and helped both Matt and myself tremendously.  It was like having a doula we hadn't planned for, and I seriously don't know how we would have made it through without her!  Kathy Bedikian was the CMN on-call for the day, and would be the one who delivered Norah.  She came down to triage, checked my cervix (was at a 4 cm dilation and 100% effaced) and confirmed that my water had broken.  I was set to be admitted!

We walked down with our nurse to our labor and delivery room - we got a room with a tub just like we wanted which was a godsend - and got settled in.    Because I was still sort of in between early and active labor, they let me order a breakfast tray and try to eat a little since I'd been up since 2:00 without much to eat.  I got Fruit Loops, some yogurt and fruit, but by the time it arrived I didn't end up eating much of it because I started throwing up - this was probably  about 11:00.  Matt helped me labor through contractions by putting counter pressure on my back.  Things started to pick up, and looking back I think this is when transition really began - I did put together that throwing up is usually a good sign that the cervix is dilating quickly.  I was starting to have difficulty finding anything that would work to help me cope, and Matt asked if it was time to get in the tub. I said yes! Matt ran water in the tub and I think I was in the water by 11:30 or so. I won't say laboring in the water took the pain away, by any means, but it was more manageable and I spent probably close to the next 4 hours in the tub.  

Transition contractions were SO much more intense than I could have imagined.  They would peak and barely come down before another one would start, and I really had a hard time catching my breath at this point.  I was trying to breathe in my nose and out my mouth, but I needed pretty much constant breathing support from Matt and Anouk to help me through.  Probably about 1:15 I realized that my body was starting to push at the top of the contractions, whether I intended it to or not.  Anouk called Kathy to come down and check me, and although it probably only took her 5 minutes to get there it felt like forever! She checked me and said I was a 9.5 - I remember asking her if she could please, please make it 10? And she must have been able to stretch the last tiny bit, because she said I could just go ahead and push.  This was such relief for a while, because my contractions spaced out and I actually had a break in between them again.  Pushing was really hard work, but for the first hour or so it was actually a nice change from transition.  By the end of the second hour of pushing in the tub though, I was getting really, really tired and discouraged and felt that I wasn't making any progress.  They all assured me I was, but I just needed a change and so we got out of the tub and moved to the bed.  I was disappointed because I had wanted to have a water birth and didn't think I wanted to be on the bed, and I cried while walking over.  Didn't have time to think about it for long, and got busy pushing again right away!  I tried several different positions to push on the bed, and finally started to feel like I was doing something each time.  They asked if I wanted a mirror, which I swore beforehand I would not want, but it actually helped a ton for me to see what was going on.  

This last stage of pushing was probably the second worst part of labor along with transition.  Kathy felt that her head was slightly turned to the side, and she used her hands to slowly rotate with each push for a while.  Once Norah's head clicked into position, she really moved down and started crowning.  Once she started crowning, it took about 20-25 minutes more before she was born...and without any pain medication or numbing...that's a really long time to crown! I had the nurses and midwives laughing at one point because I kept saying "This.Is.BEASTLY"!  I could clearly see that she was so close to being born, and yet no matter how hard I tried she just moved so slowly each time.  It ended up being a good thing, because when she was finally born at 4:22, I really had no tearing and no need for an episiotomy.  Kathy handed her to me once her shoulders were out, and I pulled her up onto my chest.  She was perfect, and from the second I had her she was holding her head up looking around the room.  Matt was amazing, and he was right there by my side every minute.  We let her rest on my chest skin to skin and waited for her cord to stop pulsing before Matt cut it.  He didn't think he'd want to, but when it was time he was ready!  Her Apgar scores were 9 and 9, and she weighed in at 9 lbs 1.9 oz, and 21 1/4" long!  Matt asked Kathy and the nurses if they played a little guessing game for how big the babies would be and they said they totally do! When I checked in at triage, Kathy thought Norah would be about 7.5 lbs, and after a long while of pushing she said she was going to have to change her guess, but even then she couldn't have predicted how big she was! She laughed that they were all off by 2 lbs!!

Our care team was incredible - Kathy was absolutely wonderful and even though I had never met her she was exactly the kind of midwife we ended up needing.  She was supportive when I would get discouraged, and reminded me that what I was doing was hard work but totally within the normal range for a first baby.  When I was really in pain, she would stroke my hair or rub my leg, and remind me that it was all helping me get closer to meeting my baby.  And Anouk, who was there by our sides the whole way...she got us through the toughest part of transition and was a tremendous support to both of us when we needed it the most.  Right after the birth, she brought us a baby hat that the students from the Netherlands had purchased as a fundraiser for supporting healthy babies in Sierra Leone - it was really special to have that from her.  The day we were going home, she also came by and brought us a pair of knitted booties that her grandmother made for her to give to all the babies she helped deliver...it brought tears to my eyes and those will always be a special reminder to us of the care and support we received that day.

Relief, Amazement, Bliss

Our first family photo

Sweetest moment

How on Earth did I have a 9 lb baby? 

(Photo taken on 4/27 before going home)